Author: still a dreamer

French Bulldog Sketches – III

/ still a dreamer / 4 Comments

Because French Bulldogs are a main feature on in my shop, and my artwork is featured quarterly in Just Frenchies magazine, many people ask me if I have a Frenchie of my own … they assume I must. The answer is no, not yet. I love the bully breeds, and I love drawing and photographing them, and I’ve become completely enamored with Frenchies over the last 5 years that I have been drawing them. So much so, that a Frenchie is the heroine in more than one of the children’s books I am working on.

But having a dog is a whole lot different than drawing and writing about one. In the 18″ of snow we’ve been hit with here recently … and repeatedly, I vividly recall what it was like not so long ago when I had two dogs, one of whom did not wish to sully her paws in that fluffy white stuff. And that was at 6:30 in the morning.

But that’s only a part of it. Dogs require time … especially a new dog. I will want to do what I always do – walk, socialize, obedience train, play and so on. Although it could change any moment, right now I would find it difficult to commit to the time I know I will give a dog.

And then, there’s kitty politics. Already an uneasy balance exists here – Miss Bossy Boots (Gypsy) spends way too much time scheming of ways to make Mewsette’s life miserable, and it’s not clear what tossing a dog in the mix might do. Although Claude would probably have a new best friend in 3 days. I firmly believe that when I am supposed to have a dog, the one that absolutely must be mine will appear.

So for now I draw. And write.

Featured here are a few more sketches, either in plain old pen, (my absolute favorite, by the way, for writing and general sketching, is Pentel R.S.V.P. Medium. It is one of THE best balanced writing pens on the market – you can feel it when you hold the pen with the cap on the end – just perfect!), and to the right, loose colored pencil. Enjoy.

Order French Bulldog cards and art here!

Note: All illustrations, drawings and photographs are © Jeanne Balsam and may not be reproduced in any format without written permission. Thank you!

 

Letting Go of Fear … in Creativity, in Life

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Fear is the antithesis of love. We are in fear when we bemoan our fate that we are not yet published. We are in fear when we relentlessly edit and re-edit and edit yet again something that, in all likelihood, is just fine. We are in fear when we overwork an aspect of our illustration, striving for some elusive perfection. It’s not that uncommon to think and behave this way. Most of us were raised to be good, to be perfect, to be loved conditionally. As were those who raised us.

And what we most need in our lives, our work, is not fear, but love. When we write and illustrate books for children, we always bring forth our best work when it is coming out of love … not anxiety about its success or perfection, or how well we are faring compared to others, or how much recognition we’ll gain. But love. It would seem so easy, but for so many of us it is not.

Below is the quote that I had mentioned in my last post. It is by Marianne Williamson, metaphysical teacher, and from the book A Return to Love, her reflections on  the principles of A Course in Miracles, published in 1975. All of Williamson’s work is focused on growing into our richest selves, letting go of fear and living truly in love. And I believe it has a profound meaning for us as we  venture forth as writers and artists, aspiring to light the way for children.

Everyday Grace

My deepest fear is not that I am inadequate.
My deepest fear is that I am powerful beyond measure.
It is my light, not my darkness, that most frightens me.
I ask myself, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who am I not to be? I am a child of God. My playing small
does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won’t feel insecure around me. I am meant to
shine, as children do. I was born to manifest the glory of God that is within me.
It’s not just in me; it’s in everyone.
And as I let my own light shine, I unconsciously give other people
permission to do the same. As I am liberated from my own fear,
my presence automatically liberates others.

These words struck me so deeply in their undeniable truth. As a writer and illustrator of children’s books, aspiring to bring my gifts to young people, I can soar to heights in joy as I work or tumble to crushing frustration. Fear. All fear. And though living lives through fear in varying degrees is common to so many people on the planet, it seems to almost be the inheritance of all sensitive, creative people. I know there is a better way; I’ve known for a long time, and so, I suspect, have you.

From time to time, books, individuals, ideas, etc.  cross our paths, and usually, at times when we are ready to take the next step out of fear and into grace … into love. This book has been sitting on my bookshelf for about 9 months, and through a mention of the quote above from a friend, I took this book from the shelf. It was time – there are no coincidences.

Living in love, free of fear, is a great challenge. We were not raised that way. Shaman and author Don Miguel Ruiz calls it “domestication.” It is all the same. And what’s so wonderful is that there is never a bad time  to take another step, to let go of fear and our belief that we should be small, to believe instead  in the love and brilliance we are.

I find A Return to Love an amazing book, as is A Woman’s Worth, both by Williamson. Perhaps an inspiration for you, too. Please also know, if it makes a difference to you, that Williamson’s writings do not espouse any specific religious orientation – her writing is of a spiritual nature, and so speaks to us all.

Love Is All You Need

/ still a dreamer / 4 Comments

Through a long, circuitous route, I found such a wonderful video …

You know sometimes how your friend e-mails you something cool? Well, my friend Kathy in Maryland sent me this great quote from the movie Akeelah and the Bee. She didn’t know where it came from, so I looked it up. The quote is from the very well-known and wonderful metaphysical writer and teacher, Marianne Williamson. I have two books of hers, A Woman’s Worth and A Return to Love. As it turns out, the quote is from the latter, called Everyday Grace, right there on her website. (Go check it out – it’s perfect.)

OK, so now I’m on her site, which I love … I scroll down and there’s this video … after watching it, I go to the “offical” Starbucks site. What I learn is that, on December 7th, 2009 at 1:30 pm GMT, Starbucks invited musicians from all over the world to sing together at the same time to raise awareness for AIDS in Africa. In that one moment, musicians from 156 countries played “All You Need is Love” together.  Watch the video as musicians from all around the world come together and share this song. Starbucks has raised enough funds for over 14 million days worth of medicine – as of this date – for those suffering with AIDS.

p.s. Now does this remind me of my favorite guy, Matt, who danced all over the world just to bring people together through dance? Yes, it does, and if you haven’t yet gotten your fill of all those warm and fuzzy feelings, go visit Where the Hell is Matt? and watch Dancing 2008. It still brings tears to my eyes.

Snow, Snow and More Snow

/ still a dreamer

And an antidote! If you are anywhere in the Northeast, you are getting slammed about now. It’s been snowing here since last night around 8:30 – going into 20 hours straight so far – and hopefully letting up sometime after midnight. From the looks of it, my neighborhood has had 14″ so far. But it sure is pretty.

The girls next door were out in the backyard building forts and having a snowball fight. The people next door – well, I just looked and see the young son standing out on the (slanted) porch roof shoveling snow down off it – now that’s a little scary!

But when I’ve really had enough of the snow, I have an antidote … hot chocolate! A friend gave this to me as part of a fabulous bag of Christmas goodies, and the bottle is so sweet, I almost don’t want to open it. But I’ll get over it!

Looking out my living room window and across the side portion of my wraparound front porch, it’s snow just as far as the eye can see. The plow comes through every now and then, but not so often. I suspect overnight, when the snow starts to let up, they will make more headway.

This isn’t a day to work, but I’ve tried and gotten some stuff done. I think it’s time to do some stuff for me – drawing? writing? Sounding good …

Stay warm everyone and happy digging out tomorrow!

Scarecrow’s Dance – Jane Yolen and Bagram Ibatoulline

/ still a dreamer / 4 Comments

When I first planned on buying this book, I admit it was largely for the magnificent illustrations of Bagram Ibatoulline. I first came across Scarecrow’s Dance as a yet-unbound copy and part of an illustrating exercise at the NJ SCBWI Illustrators’ Intensive in 2008.  I was, and still am, utterly entranced by the rich, yet soft, colors at dusk, and the beauty Ibatoulline has created in the cornfields and farm setting. If you are an illustrator or one who appreciates excellence in illustration, this book is worth the cost of that alone. And the story, in the brief exposure I had to it at that time, was so touching as to bring me to tears, and it still does.

I eagerly awaited it’s publication with my primary interest in the art. It finally arrived so I could appreciate both story and text. Jane Yolen is the author of Scarecrow’s Dance, and recipient of the Caldecott Medal for Owl Moon, and many, many other awards in her rich and extensive writing career for children. As I examined this book more closely, several thoughts did cross my mind … as beautiful as I found the illustrations, would they appeal to the target age group, 4 – 8? Would a child that age lose interest in the dusky light’s subtlety on page after page? Would a barn described “as red as blood” be disturbing to a small child? Might some parents find both a child and scarecrow kneeling and praying to God a predominantly Christian message they may not wish to read to their child in a picture book story?

I don’t actually know the answers to these. I found the overriding message to be of the greatest importance, and that is finding who we are and knowing our place in the world to be unique and one of value. I think a parent reading this story to a child with the feeling Yolen has put into it, will easily impart that as the primary message, and it is very beautifully done in both word and image.

I visited Jane Yolen’s web site, and found a wonderful section just for us writers – lots of sound advice to guide us on our journey to becoming not just published, but still sane when we get there. Kathy Temean, the RA of NJ SCBWI, also posted 20 Yolen writing tips as transcribed from the recent SCBWI Conference in New York. All great stuff.

And then, Bagram Ibatoulline. I kiss the ground this illustrator walks on. His work is simply magnificent. In addition to Scarecrow’s Dance, he has done two books by Kate DiCamillo, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Toulane and Great Joy. He illustrated a beautiful book, Crow Call, by Lois Lowry, The Serpent Came to Gloucester, and many, many others. Next time you’re in a bookstore, I highly recommend you take a look at Ibatoulline’s work.