A Small, Wonderful Movie – I Am

March 6, 2013March 7, 2013 / still a dreamer / 4 Comments

What would you want to say to the world if it became possible that you might soon die? That’s what movie director Tom Shadyac asked himself after he suffered a severe concussion in a bicycling accident. He was told the horrible after-effects could last for 2 years or for life. Or he could die. So he asked himself what he wanted to say in the event that should happen.

I’d never heard of Tom Shadyac, but recognized his movies when he discussed them in the beginning of this beautiful documentary. He directed Jim Carrey in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, Bruce Almighty, The Nutty Professor and several other similar minded films. He realized that where he’d been with humor and outrageous silliness was not where he wanted to go. He had two questions and wanted to make a documentary … What’s wrong with our world? and What can we do about it?

This short, (1 hour 17 min.), documentary moved me to tears at times, as Shadyac explored these questions through interviews with some of the greatest minds of our times – authors, scientists, religious leaders, poets, and others. He interviews or shows clips of Howard Zinn, Desmond Tutu, Nelson Mandela, Gandhi, Martin Luther King, the Dalai Lama and other notables, including his own father who founded St. Jude’s Research Hospital for Children with Danny Thomas. The thread of the documentary follows how mankind has lost its way in our quest for winning and competition, but shows how we are literally wired in our DNA for cooperation and compassion. He shares how intuitively the animal world works together – birds flock, fish shoal (see photo) – for the greater good, and how less technologically developed societies work cooperatively with one another. In American Indian tribes where sharing was the norm, hoarding was seen as a sickness, and the members of the tribe set out to heal this person.

Shadyac has gathered so many amazing clips of everything you can imagine to bring us along on his journey of inquiry – history, science, spiritual thought, the natural world. Especially moving was one short clip of something I’d never before seen except in a still … a world famous black and white photo of a slender Chinese man blocking the way of army tanks in the 1989 student protest in Tiananmen Square. In this clip, you watch him move repeatedly to block the tank each time it maneuvers. Mankind has reached out endlessly to stand up for or help others in need, in tragedies such as 9/11, Katrina, Haiti, or events such as civil rights marches and so many other instances. As he explored these issues, Shadyac came to conclusions about his own life of celebrity excess and changed that, too.

He came to realize that `What is wrong with this world?’ has an answer … I Am. But maybe I’m asking the wrong question, he thought. Perhaps I should also ask, `What is right with this world?’ Yup …. I Am.

Unless you are one of those people who believes whoever dies with the most toys wins – and I’m sure you would never have read this far if that were true – then I feel pretty confident that you will be inspired and moved by this film.

Why We Read, Why We Write … the Inspiration

February 24, 2013February 24, 2013 / still a dreamer / 8 Comments

I count myself very fortunate. Reading was an important and integral part of my life from when I was very young. Everyone in my family read – parents, grandparents and us kids – we always had a book, a magazine, a newspaper or all of the above. If we wanted something to do and the parents were busy, the answer was “Then go read your book,” and it was never a punishment.

In my pre-toddler years I was ensconced at one side of my Mom while she read to my older brother sitting on the other. I was soaking up those words like nobody’s business, and as a result I was reading … and writing … at a very early age. To this day, I am deeply grateful for this gift. It has served as a firm foundation for my never-ending love of reading, learning and writing.

When I was old enough to have a library card, and I believe that was at 5 years old and in kindergarten, I was part of the weekly trek to the town library, where my brother and I would each return with a stack of books. It was one of my greatest thrills to go to that library. And I remember it well because the original building was unlike most others in our little town. The Dixon Homestead Library was an old Dutch Colonial stone house with a gabled roof. (In doing a little research, I found that it was built between 1780 and 1790 by Derick Banta, a Revolutionary War soldier whose birth home on this same site was burned down by the Tories.) When I was a bit older, an adjoining addition for children was built and I remember being able to walk from one “house” to the other.

As a result of my love of books, I also loved to write and still do. Today, as I picked up Bird by Bird – Some Instructions on Writing and Life by Anne Lamott, and after finishing The Smoke Jumper last night, I couldn’t help but think about why we write and why we read.

I believe we read to learn about another’s experience … to be transported into another world in which we feel something that is meaningful to us, whether that is romance, terror, curiosity, amazement or intellectual enrichment of all kinds. We want to experience that which another knows and/or feels and can bring us through words. A good writer touches some part of us that says, Yes! This speaks to me.

Is this, then, why we write? If we are true to our hearts, I would have to say yes because we are at our best when we write what we know. Our writing has the most impact when our reader is drawn in to the world we create and wants to stay. I am aware that when I write, I want to make a difference to a young reader; whether he or she is 5 or 12 years old, it is my fondest hope that her life will be enriched in some way by my words. As I embark on a new writing project, I know I have a lot to think about and learn. I will have to revisit memories and feelings that will make a story come alive. But in this way, I hope to carry the torch of so many amazing authors that have inspired me, touched and enriched my life over the years.

But then … I also write because I simply love to write.

Children’s Book Illustrator Bagram Ibatoulline

February 21, 2013August 23, 2015 / still a dreamer

While purchasing novels at ridiculously low prices at book sales is great, books featuring the work of outstanding illustrators simply must be bought new and treasured. In this category, I cannot say enough good things about Bagram Ibatoulline. He has become one of my favorite illustrators over the last few years.

In Crow Call by Lois Lowry, a Newbery Medal winner, Ibatoulline brings to life both the characters and the autumn quiet of the woods and fields of rural Pennsylvania. Liz is the shy daughter reconnecting with her father who’s been gone a long time to war. They slowly re-establish their relationship with “Daddy” taking Liz out for a very special breakfast and then a trip to the woods where she calls the crows to wake up and come to her. Daddy has brought his gun to hunt, but easily sees where Liz’ heart is. The story itself is touching, but the illustrations are magnificent.

The feel of the woods and the trees, the capturing of the crows in flight, and the beauty in facial expression and body language of Liz and Daddy are just superb. Ibatoulline was born in Russia and is the illustrator of many acclaimed books, two of which will welcome Crow Call to my bookshelves, Scarecrow’s Dance and The Miraculous Journey of Edward Toulane. His illustration graces picture and middle grade books of all kinds from fairy tales to history to wonderful stories by some of our best modern day authors and poets.

If you are a fan of brilliant children’s book illustration, Bagram Ibatoulline will certainly inspire and delight you.

In the Moment

February 1, 2013 / still a dreamer / 6 Comments

At 4:30 this morning I was jarred into awakening by the sound of my currently empty garbage can hurtling across my back porch to points South. (It was placed there as the least likely spot to be pushed around by winds gusting to 50 mph. Clearly, the wind knew better than I.)

And at that pre-dawn hour, when many unwelcome thoughts clamber into our consciousness, a score of them crowded my mind. They all had to do with the future and with things that in all likelihood would never come to pass. But such is the mindset when we are catapulted into wakefulness from a sound sleep.

Some time later, curled up on the couch with my coffee and happily-fed, drowsy cats, I opened up to read from The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo. In language far more poetic than my own, he described the ancient human challenge of staying in the miracle that is and not falling into the black hole of what is not. He provided a simple breathing exercise to let go of all the imagined outcomes that are not yet real. In other words, be in the moment. Perfect.

So this evening, just about 12 hours after my abrupt morning awakening, I was working at my desk. The wind continued to wrestle with the trees and I looked out the window to see the magnificent sky pictured above. At first, I thought to continue my work. Then I realized that that sky was the miracle of now, exactly what I had been reading about and reflecting upon. I chose that moment.

Finding Ourselves

December 22, 2012December 22, 2012 / still a dreamer / 2 Comments

Unwrapped Christmas gifts are calling, laundry’s going, and a million other things are turning in my head. How about you? It occurred to me quite some time ago that if it weren’t for women, there would be no Christmas, no Thanksgiving, no birthday celebrations, no parties celebrating milestones in someone’s life … we sure do keep it all going. But I digress.

Either life looked simpler when we were growing up or our mothers were masters at hiding the juggling acts we now perform nearly 24/7. I opt for the former. There is always so much going on, so many demands, that one of the first things to get lost is us … ourselves. As regular readers of this blog know, there are always 2 books to the right. A novel, (usually), and below it a book that provides me with some sort of inspiration for the current time in my life. Sometimes we need some enlightenment … some guidance … a little light to show us the way and brighten our tomorrows.

At the top, Paradise by Toni Morrison is an unbelievably fabulous book, but it’s been sitting there for awhile because it’s not the kind of book you can just leave off and pick up – you want to really read it. So until I can devote that time again, Toni will wait until I can give her my full attention. She and Paradise deserve that much. The book below represents the third one I’ve been in and out of, trying to find what speaks to me now.

And the winner is …. Something More by Sarah Ban Breathnach. Her first book, Simple Abundance, A Daybook of Comfort and Joy was also a winner, and one I’ve read more than once. What Sarah does is speak to the woman in us who is longing to find herself amid the million things that tug at our sleeves, and even amid a life where we have it quite good in so many ways, a life for which we are truly grateful.

But what’s more? What is it that we never quite have the time for in our lives? Our dreamer … our true self who gets buried or abandoned for so many reasons, the woman with whom we’ve lost touch along the way. Sarah brings us back to that self.

In the beginning section, Our Authentic Lives, she tells us, ” ….How many conversations would I not only have started but finished if I had known I possessed a warrior’s heart? I wish I’d known that I’d been born to take on the world; I wouldn’t have run from it for so long, but run to it with open arms.”

It’s hard to argue with that. So here we all are, amidst the hustle and bustle of the holidays, being stretched in every direction from what’s related to them and what’s not, but we needn’t be lost. We can search out and still find that beautiful woman, (or man), who wants to take on the world in the most meaningful and authentic way. Yes, it does take a wee bit of time each day, however we do it, but aren’t we worth it? Right now, my gentle illumination – my reminder to remember me – is in this book. You may find yours elsewhere, but that wee bit of time is yours for the making and taking.

Just as we have so much more love to give when we genuinely love ourselves, we have that much more to give when we have found our true selves and are living the life we are meant to live. We are given today.