“The misery of man appears like childish petulance, when we explore the steady and prodigal provision that has been made for his support and delight on this green ball which floats him through the heavens.”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson, from Nature
Reflections
One Little Piggy …
It struck me, as I looked through the many shots I’ve taken with my digital camera, how many I’ve taken of late for “a reason” and how few just for the joy. Even this shot of a wonderful bronze-like piggy that I purchased from a local craftsperson for an amazing price was taken to show someone else. Yet I enjoy that I’ve captured the pig in this photo.
I’m pondering this as I look at the most likely end to an incident that happened to me about 2 weeks ago. I was struck by a Toyota Sequoia shortly after I, a pedestrian, had entered the crosswalk. It took a lot of energy out of me, and of course, tending to believe, as we often do, that I’m invincible, I am also upset and frustrated that I can’t quite move on with my life as planned. Two weeks later, I’m healing rather well, and realizing how much worse it could have been. So despite bills that will be coming my way, and aways to go before several of the injuries will be resolved, I’m still much happier being less scathed.
Then I noticed that I just exhaled. The worst is over. And for whatever that means, it does mean this – I can get on with the part of my life that was suspended in mid-air, the most creative part. I have not felt like journaling; I have not drawn so much as a stick; and have not been working on my children’s books. Who felt like it? Who knew how this would all go? Now I know, and I’ll be picking up and moving on. I hadn’t expected that the most, and perhaps least obvious, area of my life to be affected would be my creativity. Somewhere in the physical pain, discomfort, disbelief at my fate, sadness, anxiety and all that went along with it, creativity just got snuffed out.
So I’m re-igniting the pilot light. I’m looking at this little bronze-like pig that appears to be smiling when I look at her. Yeah – I believe I’m back.
Bat Visit
Last night, I had a most unexpected visitor. While watching TV upstairs, curled up with Claude and Mewsette, the two cats suddenly sat up and stared wide-eyed at the nearest window. Within seconds I knew why. Something had entered the room. While it first seemed like a medium sized bird, I knew better, and realized I now had a Big Brown Bat flying around the room.
Doing my best not to panic and trying to figure out how to help him with none of us getting hurt, I efficiently herded the cats out of the room and closed the door, turned off the ceiling fan, and opened another window and screen, thus allowing a pretty good exit space. I left the room. Called my wildlife rehabilitator friend for any more tips, accordingly blocked the bottom of the door with a blanket. I wasn’t prepared to risk the possible bite of this little guy who might soon be panicking himself and run into me by mistake.
I called the State Police hoping for emergency animal control assistance, but instead 2 Troopers came, one experienced in handling bats with no injury to the bat – just what I wanted. Happily, my bat-escape-plan seemed to work and he had exited. So did the two nice Troopers. I was just jangled. Figured out how the bat had gotten in and adjusted that. Had a fitful night’s sleep.
I woke up in the morning, still jangled, then realized – I knew why the bat had flown into my life! I got my book by Ted Andrews, Animal Speak, and looked up Bat as a totem animal. Again. This is the third home where I have had unusual experiences with bats. And for good reason – they are strong indicators of transition and initiation in one’s life, and that sums up mine, as I struggle to give up old, useless, fearful patterns in moving forward to my dreams.
The bat reflects “the breaking down of the former self through intense tests. It is a facing of your greatest fears – that it is time to die to some aspect of your life that is no longer suitable for you ….If a bat has flown into your life, then it is the time to face your fears and prepare for change. You are being challenged to let go of the old and create the new.
“Changes and transformations are blessings. They are not triggered from without but from within; and the world is our mirror …this means opening to the power within which will override all our fears.”
This unexpected visitor was alone; there are no other bats living outside near or around that window, I checked, and on a logical level, there is no reason why a bat would’ve come inside the house at 9 p.m. But I have found that different animal species may appear to us, seemingly out of context, as indicators of circumstances in our lives.
As one who has always had a strong connection with animals, I believe if we are open to them and what they have to share, we can learn amazing lessons. What had been an unsettling experience, not only ended well for all, but put a big smile on my face.
A bat quite literally flew into my life and reminded me that I could give up the old junk that holds me back, and open further to my own power and my dreams. Change is good.
Afraid of Bugs and a Hanging Thief
How I became afraid of bugs started when I was a child. Where else? I can only attribute this fear to a mother who was terrified of the tiniest spider on the ceiling which my Dad had to remove immediately. A little girl, being identified with her mother and all – well, clear enough where that came from. Bugs were made out to be evil itself.
But wait. My father was exactly the opposite. He carefully scooped up any intruders in his handkerchief and ushered them out the back door, free to fly or crawl away. I recall once in the summer in the backyard, I was becoming upset over a gnat in my lemonade. I know – a gnat, right? Clear as day, I remember my father saying, “Look! He’s hardly drinking anything at all!” That brought a faint smile through my tears. He sure wasn’t afraid of bugs.
Alas, my Mom’s fearful cries were louder than my father’s calm voice of reason, but in the end … Dad’s reason prevailed. Today, I know bugs are cool.
Robber Fly - Hanging Thief
While I do prefer that I spot them first rather than them land on me unexpectedly lest I have a throwback experience, I realize that insects are quite fascinating. This morning I sat out on the back porch to journal. There I have a bunch of potted impatiens, polka dot plants and black coleus. Sitting with my coffee and about to write, I noticed an unusual character sitting in the impatiens. Got the digital, took some close-ups and decided to find out what it was at the end of my work day.
Fast forward to 6 p.m. and I’m on a really cool site that I just love, now that I’m not so afraid of bugs – What’s That Bug? I figured with those huge eyes, he had to be some kind of fly though he didn’t look like one. Sure enough – there he was – a Robber Fly, and of the type called the Hanging Thief. So now I know about Robber Flies, how they’re beneficial, and why I shouldn’t push my luck and aggravate one, not that I would anyway. (They have a painful bite when pushed to their limit.) Pretty cool!
OK – it’s not my plan for this to be a bug site. Really. They just seem to keep showing up when I’m sitting still. And as bugs are creepy to so many people, I guess it’s not so bad to give them a little good press. Who knows? Maybe I can help you be a little less afraid of bugs.
Who Weaves Half A Spider Web?
Amazing Half-Woven Spider Web
It must be a pretty talented spider, indeed, who can weave only half a web, or even weave a full one in such a manner, that overnight, precisely one half of it vanishes. Click on the photo to enlarge it – it really is only half a spider web!
Or is it? I had to run and get the camera to catch this lovely trompe-l’oeil. As I went out early to sit on the back porch and journal while it was still cool, I looked up and noticed this “half-web.” I couldn’t see its creator, but based on the size of her web, I’d say she’s a pretty big girl as well as an orb-weaving spider. I was fascinated by how the morning sunlight captured the spider web, and how part of the porch roof shadowed the other half, giving the half-web effect.
I am reminded of how many small wonders are always there for us to find, but may only be noticed when we’re not rushing about at 100 mph. Okay – guilty. Some of the time, anyway. So I thank the spider for reminding me to slow down, to look up, look around and see the many small gifts that surround me. Ahhhhh – that feels better!
Still A Dreamer 