dreams

It’s hard to believe that just one week ago today life as we knew it had totally changed for a period of 48 magical hours. Stressful – but magical hours. Friday, June 4th and Saturday, June 5th was the NJ SCBWI Annual Conference, held this year at the Princeton Regency Hyatt.

The Hyatt atrium, empty above, was abuzz with NJ SCBWI Conference participants – editors, agents, speakers, attendees, organizers, volunteers and a very helpful Hyatt staff. That area with tables of four at the forefront was our registration area with an endless stream of people coming in to be greeted and given their materials. The fairy-lighted area to the rear left and below was our open buffet dinner area Friday night, and the step-up areas with small tables at rear right were filled with agents and editors giving critiques. On the lower level, workshops, first page sessions and intensives were going on, all opening to a wide center aisle where illustrators had displayed their work in a juried art show. Upstairs, outside of the dining areas, a portfolio display, book signing and auction took turns over the two days.

It was a jam-packed, enlightening two days, preceded by days and weeks of stressful preparations and anticipation. NJ SCBWI‘s first year in the Hyatt was a great success, thanks to RA, Kathy Temean and Assistant RA, Laurie Wallmark, bolstered by volunteers at every turn.

So how come it’s taken one full week to blog about this inspiring event? Initially, exhaustion. I know I’m not the only one who simply crashed on Sunday. I barely had the energy, though I did it anyway, to start preparation of an MS with a couple illustrations to send to the agent who critiqued me. Tired as I was on Sunday, I elected to wait until Monday with some more rest behind me to make sure I sounded literate. And sent that off. Then starting the work of revising another MS which was critiqued by that agent and also the editors in a First Page Session for a submission.

What made it more difficult for me … and I suspect for others in my shoes … is that Monday morning I have to fold up my dream and tuck it away neatly while I go back to work. Problem was that this time, that dream was not about to stay folded away neatly, nor was it going to wait ’til the end of the day when I could give it some attention. Nope. It kept teasing and wheedling and enticing and trying its best to make me stop working and pay it some serious attention. “Look at me!” said my dream. “You know you want to!”

I was still tired for a good part of the week, but worse off, I was frozen in space.

Both needing and wanting to work, I was feeling a pull stronger than ever to turn around and work on my manuscript and a new very rough dummy. (I do love my work, but as I’m self-employed, if I don’t do it, no one else does and I don’t make any money!) Half the time I felt like the rope in a tug of war. Of course, I ultimately and ever-so-responsibly settled down and attended to my graphics work, and came up with some pretty cool stuff, and started my children’s book work after dinner.

However, I notice that dream has developed quite a mouth on it.

Okay, it’s Friday. You talkin’ to me? Let’s do it!

Dreams are very important. Not only do they assist and protect our physical and mental health, but they tell us things. Things we need to know.

Last night I slept an uninterrupted 8 hours for the first time I can remember in a very long time, and had a dream. It is a dream that comes to me at certain points in time, and always has something to tell me. The overall setting of the dream is more or less the same, but the elements and how they relate to my life situation at the given moment are different. I woke up this morning knowing what the dream had to say, and it was all good.

For many months I have been in strictly survival mode, dealing with one ailment after another, none life-threatening, but continually draining me. All my creativity was funneled into my design business and my web business, both at their peak of activity at Christmas, (what there was of it.) At the end of the day, I just faded. My dream of writing and illustrating children’s books was gathering dust in the corner.

And then came the bright spot, helping me pick the dream up, dust it off, and sit it right here next to me, it’s little face beaming with hope again. That bright spot was a meeting with my fellow facilitators of my local writing and illustrating group, HCCWIG. Although it was not my turn to be critiqued, the company of these creative, funny, warm and intelligent women infused my dream with life again, and I believe, helped me to also have that wonderful dream.

So today, I raise my (coffee) cup in a toast of cheer to (in alphabetical order — drum roll please) …. Cathy, Felicia, Laurie, Leeza and Sheri (and yes, even Little O) … for being the inspiring group they are. My dream is wriggling with excitement for when we can next sit down together and create something magical in children’s books. Thanks, guys!

The moral of the story: If you are a writer (or illustrator) feeling the need for support in your craft, be sure to seek out and find a local writers’ group — many are often listed on the SCBWI site. So check out and join SCBWI, too! Reach out and find fellow creatives that share your dream, and who will be happy to hold its hand through the tough times and celebrate in the good.