What Makes You Happy?

September 22, 2013 / still a dreamer / 8 Comments

I came across this wonderful quote today and it just stopped me in my tracks. Huh, I thought, isn’t that the truth?

“It isn’t what you have or who you are or where you are or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about it.”

― Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People

And that set me pondering .. exactly what is it that makes me happy? When I stopped to think about it, there were so many things … and then I realized that what really makes me happy can sometimes change from minute to minute. This moment it can be a fall-scented candle, the next, the smile of someone I care about, noticing how surprisingly graceful is the flight of a Chinese mantis, the color of the coffee in my cup, the well-crafted labyrinthine twists and turns in the book I”m reading, the small feline squeaking at me for food, etc. Think about it … that’s where the happiness is – in our attitude towards everything in our lives. That’s not to say we should be Pollyanas. But how we look at what is in our lives can make the biggest difference in how happy we are. Mind you, I am not saying that I have mastered the zen art of peace and happiness every moment of the day, but I am getting better and better in knowing how to find it and embrace it, as can you.

I decided to do an online search for a photo of happiness for this post. As you can imagine, that brought up a real cross-section of images. Some of marriage, some of children and others of people leaping for joy, animals, music, beautiful nature scenes, etc. because happiness is often very subjective. Of all the photos I looked at, what made ME feel happiness at that exact moment was the photograph above of this child playing in the rain, such joy in his face.

In a little while, it may be something else, but for right now … that’s happy. And it’s good.

Accepting Now

January 15, 2012 / still a dreamer

I’m always a big fan of good quotes, and this one came up on my metaphysical flip calendar on Friday.

“You cannot live on earth and avoid lessons; but you can learn them easily and with joy rather than struggle.” – Sanaya Roman and Duane Packer.

I’m thinking that learning them easily and with joy IS a big lesson no? I’ve been observing and talking to others and thinking about my own experiences, and realizing how much of our stress and anxiety is attached to outcomes, i.e. our having a lot invested in our own expectations coming to pass. Sometimes our expectations are based on “reality” and are reasonable. But sometimes they’re really what we want to happen. Or not to happen. In the latter two cases, the result is the same; we are not living in the present world of possibilities or accepting what is and we become messy balls of anxiety.

So in accepting the not-knowing, it might seem like we’re spending our lives walking on a tightrope of uncertainty, and in a way, I suppose we are. But if we believe that there is a reason why things happen, whether we can see it or not, that there may be a bigger picture that we don’t know about, or a lesson we have yet to discern, then the tightrope has an infinite safety net. We’re really always OK. It’s our own attachment to outcomes that prevents us from walking that sparkling tightrope called life with confidence and perfect balance. And leaping with joy. Yes!

Accepting Now and being grateful for all we have in this moment, can bring us joy and help us learn our lessons without struggle. It can be a challenge. I’m right on the journey’s path with the rest of you, trying to grasp the lesson a little better, on a deeper level each time, and coming back to joy. Happy travels.

Where Is the Joy?

September 10, 2010 / still a dreamer

If you are a woman and you are reading this, then there’s a good chance that you are struggling to find the joy in life. Today’s pace, especially for women, is more frenetic than ever. Many of us are working, maintaining a home for ourselves and others, raising children, and running like crazy. We are often overwhelmed and exhausted. Despite all this, we may still be reasonably happy, or … we may be downright miserable.

I do believe our natural soul state is one of love and joy. And that it easily gets lost in the pace of everyday life. As I am reading Marianne Williamson’s book, A Woman’s Worth, I find myself dwelling on this section where she writes about joy. She writes that joy is what happens when we recognize how good things are, how beautiful and amazingly powerful we are as women. And she adds that we can create joy in our daily life; we can decide to be happy. It may take our attention and some effort to focus on this, but it is possible.

I know, and perhaps you have, too, the feeling of real joy. For me, it is a distinct feeling that all is right in the world; all is well and perfect at that moment. The fact is that we can experience this feeling so much more often by focusing on the good, and on the amazing beings we, as women, are. I want more joy; how about you? Reading A Woman’s Worth is just fueling that desire for joy right now. This might be a book you’d be interested in if you’d like to discover more of your own joy and your own worth in the world.

Without ever getting into a women’s rights kind of attitude, but always staying in the positive and the uplifting, Williamson writes about how women have lost their place and been kept down throughout much of history, and conversely, of all we are and can be.

The passage that I love in this section is as follows. “A joyful woman, merely by being, says it all. The world is terrified of joyful women. Make a stand. Be one anyway.”