Still A Dreamer

It struck me, as I looked through the many shots I’ve taken with my digital camera, how many I’ve taken of late for “a reason” and how few just for the joy. Even this shot of a wonderful bronze-like piggy that I purchased from a local craftsperson for an amazing price was taken to show someone else. Yet I enjoy that I’ve captured the pig in this photo.

I’m pondering this as I look at the most likely end to an incident that happened to me about 2 weeks ago. I was struck by a Toyota Sequoia shortly after I, a pedestrian, had entered the crosswalk. It took a lot of energy out of me, and of course, tending to believe, as we often do, that I’m invincible, I am also upset and frustrated that I can’t quite move on with my life as planned. Two weeks later, I’m healing rather well, and realizing how much worse it could have been. So despite bills that will be coming my way, and aways to go before several of the injuries will be resolved, I’m still much happier being less scathed.

Then I noticed that I just exhaled. The worst is over. And for whatever that means, it does mean this – I can get on with the part of my life that was suspended in mid-air, the most creative part. I have not felt like journaling; I have not drawn so much as a stick; and have not been working on my children’s books. Who felt like it? Who knew how this would all go? Now I know, and I’ll be picking up and moving on. I hadn’t expected that the most, and perhaps least obvious, area of my life to be affected would be my creativity. Somewhere in the physical pain, discomfort, disbelief at my fate, sadness, anxiety and all that went along with it, creativity just got snuffed out.

So I’m re-igniting the pilot light. I’m looking at this little bronze-like pig that appears to be smiling when I look at her. Yeah – I believe I’m back.