Health

Alone … kind of

/ still a dreamer / 2 Comments

If you love animals, chances are good that you are never alone. Whether you have people around you or not, we animal lovers likely have a pet keeping us company. Some think that doesn’t count, but it counts a great deal.

I was thinking this morning; Jazzy passed away nearly two months ago. She was the only animal in the house, and having no little four-footeds padding about is a big change. Of course, we need time to mourn and miss an animal who is no longer with us. But then came an interesting stage which I had not expected. As I cleaned each room in anticipation of a new resident, I noticed that cat hair was not coming back – seemingly an obvious outcome, right?

However, it was an unknown pleasure as I sat down to write each morning … there was never cat hair on the couch. Never. Hmmm …. I could get used to this, I thought, knowing even as it crossed my mind, that I never would.

When I was 20, a junior in college, I took a drive upstate with a friend to visit her former art teacher. The place was a sprawling shambles with cats everywhere, and I mean everywhere. There may have been 30, 40 or more – different ages, appearances, states of health, and none neutered. In the house were two mothers nursing litters, and though I hadn’t planned on it, I took one of those kittens home — an adorable grey polydactl who I named Pharaoh. It soon became apparent that she had distemper. Thanks to the kindness of a local vet, she pulled through, likely the only one of that litter to survive. Pharaoh lived to a healthy 18-1/2 years old, my first pet as an adult.

Since that time, my house has never been without a cat and/or dog except for a week or so after Claude passed away. And even then, there were my next door buddies, Pumpkin and Cloudy, always visiting. Here we are now, at the next stage, looking for the cat who’ll restore that wonderful animal energy to a house where a purr has been sorely missing.

How Much Time for Ourselves?

/ still a dreamer / 6 Comments

Technically speaking, all our time is for ourselves, but when we ask this question, what is implied is how much time for things we don’t have to or should do. How much time for things that make us happy or give us pleasure? And how do we even know where that line is?

The bottom line is (speaking for myself), I am not getting any younger and there are things that are important to do, even if reading a book is one of them, or sharing time with like-minded people. There is always the reality that an income needs to be made, a house kept up, animals cared for, but what about the rest?

Raised in a society that firmly believes in a strong work ethic (which is fine to a degree), we are also often raised to believe that we should always be busy, “doing something” (meaningful is the implication there), and enjoy our reward at the end of the day or perhaps on the weekend. But what about if we toss our schedule and sit and read a book for a few hours smack dab in the middle of the (work) day? Or write? Or draw? Is that tyranny? Punishable by guilt?

Personally, I’m very tired of the restraints that are so incorporated in our brains that they became our reality. But that’s just the old reality we were raised with. I want to create a new reality. I am ready for the book you see here – it’s about changing everything and the way we perceive it and how we live and how we can heal ourselves. It requires learning, understanding, and focusing in a way that we were never taught, or even knew existed in those formative years. Change.

How much time is really for me? For ourselves? Why not change the equation?

Beginning Early in Life

/ still a dreamer / 10 Comments

My love of nature and animals began when I was very, very young. I give some of the credit to my Dad, who was the gardener in the family, and who was always so kind and considerate to all creatures, including the bumblebees and wasps that occasionally got in the house.

People were often surprised that I knew the names of so many flowers and plants at such an early age. Generally, it was because my Dad had planted them somewhere around the house or in the yard, and I followed him with endless questions. At other times, it was because our family visited places like the Bronx Botanical Gardens, or the Bronx Zoo (now the Bronx Zoological Park). I consider myself very lucky to have had my innate love of animals and nature nurtured as I did.

For many of us, it’s not really all that far to walk someplace to appreciate the beauty of nature. Being in nature is so healing, so restorative, to mind and spirit. I am reminding myself – and you, too, if you’d like a reminder – to take a little time among the trees, flowers, and greening earth.

The day goes quickly and we can miss the chance. Life goes quickly, and we can miss the chance.

Photo credit of me: William Spohn (my Dad)

Scattered

/ still a dreamer / 4 Comments

You know that feeling of being all over the place? Yeah. That’s where I am. There are so many things that I both need to do and want to do (not necessarily the same things), and I feel like I’m in the center of the room, spinning, not knowing which way to go.

A fellow writerly blogger, Pam, just did a clever post on her blog, roughwighting, which weaves the titles of many of the books she’s read this past year into a coherent story. Then she lists allllll the books she’s read. Talk about intimidating! What have I been doing with myself in 2023 that I haven’t read that many?? (Please cue the self-pity.)

She asks what is the best book we’ve read in 2023, and at least I can answer that one – The Museum of Extraordinary Things by Alice Hoffman. It expanded my list of my 6 favorite novels of all time to 7. But back to the spinning ….

  • Many, many things need to be done to get my show on the road to both fulfill my dreams and make a living – that’s my actual workload. Love it all, but a big chunk of my time.
  • I want to read my current book, Educated by Tara Westover. Also the two non-fiction I’m reading, The Creative Act by Rick Rubin and Sensitive is the New Strong by Anita Moorjani. I want to listen to more music, and keep watching the Kdrama I’m really enjoying, Itaewon Class
  • But I feel like baking chocolate chip cookies. And I’ve been thinking of trying the faux tuna I bought in a tuna-noodle casserole and need to find a recipe.
  • And I have still more sorting and purging to do of belongings, art, and furniture in the back bedroom I’m losing to it being annexed to next door, and need to find homes for it all, a consuming task.
  • I need to start drawing for my own book. I want to update a manuscript or two to send to publishers.
  • A bit more snow shoveling to do. Maybe tomorrow, some nice photos of the recent snowfall. (Above is an earlier snow shot.) And a quick run out to get fresh eggs.

I do make lists, but I think we sometimes have to sit ourselves down and remind ourselves that we really are one person, forgive ourselves for not being super-human. Stop spinning. Take the deep breath we need to take. And breathe. Just breathe.