Pushing Buttons

April 10, 2009 / still a dreamer

pushbutton We all get our buttons pushed. No doubt we push others’ buttons, too. But what happens when we get our buttons pushed is a variety of emotional reactions, none of which is usually very good.

Getting our buttons pushed can make us angry, afraid, resentful, depressed, withdrawn and so many other feelings. The results in the “real” world are that we behave differently than we did “pre-push.” Most often, when buttons get pushed, they are old buttons .. ones that have a history, and were pushed in the past. Maybe a lot. And when they all happen to get pushed at once? by a lot of people? Well, then things happen. Or don’t.

In my case, I fell off my blog entries. Didn’t feel much like writing. What’s always true, with rare exception, is the button-pushers push everyone’s buttons that way – the button pushing is really their issue and never personal. It often feels personal, though, and can be quite tiring. Will those people change who they are? Chances are, no. Can we do anything about it? Sure! We can bring their behavior to their attention, and if they care enough about us, they may try and adjust it. We can also avoid those people or situations, and if that’s not possible, limit exposure to them. Finding a way to deal with the button-pushers is also helpful.

But what really works is understanding that we have buttons and that it’s always old stuff. The button-pushers? Their issue, not personal … let it go and move on.

Living By Water

February 22, 2009 / still a dreamer

How lucky am I? I live 3 houses away from a river. And walking 4 very short blocks, I can walk onto the bridge that takes me to neighboring PA.

delaware-winter

Yesterday I went out walking for my exercise and decided to take my camera. Something I don’t do often enough. I was immediately drawn to the river on this sunny day – blue sky, no clouds. I headed onto the bridge, not to go to PA, but just to see the river. Even in winter, with not a leaf in sight, it was magnificent.

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I am happy when living by water. I am always happy to just be near water – the ocean, a lake, a river – there is something calming, inspiring and renewing about it. I wonder if this is universal or something belonging to just some of us. Is it because my family used to go the shore throughout my childhood and my Dad taught me to swim in the ocean? Is it because in my tween and teen years we used to vacation up at Highland Lakes every summer? Or perhaps that we used to go on a Sunday to Cooper’s Pond in the neighboring town and feed the ducks? I took some of my very first photos with my new Brownie camera there. Maybe it’s because I’m a water sign. Maybe I was once a mermaid. Maybe I am just forever enchanted by nature.

Our creativity, in whatever way we express ourselves, is influenced by all of who we are and who we have been. I believe when we reach inside ourselves and touch upon the good things, the meaningful things, in our pasts – or even find them for the first time – we are enriched in every way. Yet we make so little time for these things … to let ourselves be with our own enchantment … to just let ourselves be. Today, for this, I thank the river.

Remembering Who We Are

January 21, 2009January 21, 2009 / still a dreamer

It really can be difficult to find the time to write, draw, dummy, or be creative when there is just too much to do. I do journal faithfully, nearly every day without fail, and on days when I want to blog, allow myself the luxury of that being my journaling for the day. But there are days when my journal entry looks like raging chicken scratch and a desperate plea for someone to toss out a life-preserver. We all have those days, sometimes too many of them.

wolfcandle

It’s these days in particular which remind us that it pays to have something REALLY simple we can do daily to help us get centered or calm regardless of what life has in store for us on any given day. For me, that’s lighting a candle. I realized some time ago that candles are not a luxury, but a necessity. So I always have a nice variety on hand, scents that I love and make me happy, and nice things to burn them in.

I don’t think it really matters what it is that we do, but just something small that grounds us. My morning coffee – also a necessity – does that, too, but the candle is different. Choosing the scent I want to smell, what holder I’d most enjoy and where to put it takes just moments, but starts my day well. Or better. A small ritual that sets the tone.

We all can benefit from starting our day, or even a task. with something easy and small, whatever it is, that clears us a bit, lights our way, and helps us remember who we are. Do you have some small daily ritual that gets your day off on the right foot and centers you?

New Year’s Resolutions – Wranglers of Dreams

January 1, 2009January 1, 2009 / still a dreamer

starsinsky

“Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.” ~Les Brown

It’s New Year’s Day – the day that folks sit down and make resolutions to do or not do the things that will help them be better/do better in the New Year – or at least that’s what the deal is always set out to be. And then ensues the guilt, disappointment and shame of either we or others failing to live up to our New Year’s Resolutions. A real Catch-22.

But what are New Year’s Resolutions, anyway? Sitting down today to do some writing on my children’s books and hopefully, some dummying of one of my stories, I looked at my own thoughts as I approach the New Year. I don’t make New Year’s Resolutions. It’s already pretty clear where I want to go and what I need to get there; however, making that list can be a real double-edged sword. I’ve chosen not to make it. Here’s why.

New Year’s Resolutions are nothing more than the wranglers of our dreams. They are akin to rounding up those wild and wide-ranging dreams from starry skies and corralling them into a pen where we can number and categorize them. And tame them. The beauty of our dreams lies in their freedom. The beauty IS in who we are and who we can be.

Why not join our starry dreams in the sky and envision ourselves already there? Why not envision ourselves published with children excitedly reading our books rather than making dull lists about what we have to do to get there? The details will take care of themselves. It’s the vision that counts. Open the paddock gate and let the dreams fly free, far, far away from encumbering lists.

Know that the vision and dreams live within your own heart; that’s where each New Year lies.

The Dollar Christmas Plate

December 24, 2008June 3, 2012 / still a dreamer

christmasplate How does one know the Christmas season has begun? Ignoring the fact that the onslaught of marketing for the holidays has now begun shortly after Halloween to make commercialism at an all time high of 7-8 weeks, what happens in your home that says Christmas will soon be coming?

For me, it’s the bringing forth of two different Christmas dishes – my humble, dollar store plates and my bright red, green and white decorated, coffee mugs. I’ll admit that perhaps why they are the first manifestation of Christmas is that they are conveniently at hand, as are all my dishes, right there in a kitchen cabinet. But there’s something about putting away my winter mugs and replacing them them with the festive red ones, and putting away my stoneware plates in a lower cabinet, their upper spot now taken with these simple china plates, that gets hopes and dreams to stirring.

No doubt the dollar store plates were made in China, too, (the mugs were made in Germany), so as befits this time of celebration, each year I bless those who made and painted them and thank them for this small joy that marks the beginning of the season for me.

Christmas changes as we grow older … once it was the excitement of opening presents under the tree in the morning; later, coming home from college and seeing family and old friends; then through relationships, perhaps children, and so it goes. Each year becoming a little bit different, offering some slightly different gift. Christmas steadily brings the exchange of warm wishes of family and friends, some who we barely have time to keep up with during the year. Cards are still sent and received, and though sometimes in too much of a rush, we get them out and delight at the treasure in our mailboxes.

Among our gifts may be something thoughtful from someone unexpected, new friends, the comfort and love of old ones, new music that fits us just right, the book that we need to read exactly at this moment in time, a candle scent carrying us back over time … riches, all. The care, preparation, hopes and dreams of each of our Christmas or holiday seasons always begins with one simple thing … something as simple as a dollar Christmas plate.