Moving through The Flame

/ still a dreamer / 4 Comments

I believe it was the Christmas before last that a dear friend gave me The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo. Nepo is a poet who writes a daily (prose) offering of guidance for the reader, drawn from his own experiences, from others who struggle with their own humanness as well as the wisdom of the great traditions and teachers. Every day is a different subject and a beautifully written piece.

When I first got the book, I diligently followed along every day, enjoying the wisdom offered for the entire year. Now I dip in when I feel the call to do so which almost always assures me of a nugget of truth which is exactly what I need to hear at that time. I opened the book this morning to where my bookmark sat, May 25th, Through the Wall of Flame. The first paragraph reads:

Living long enough, we each find ourselves surrounded by an old way of being, thinking, or loving that is going up in flames. In that unexpected moment, we usually find ourselves full of fear, feeling trapped by an old way of life coming in on us. But this is the passage of rebirth that we must move through if our lives are to unfold. It is the momentary and painful crossing from what is old into what is new.

Nepo goes on to say how understandable it is to stall at this wall of flame, not wanting to go through, but that old ways can burn forever, and we can waste years in the waiting for the flames to go out. And they often never do.

I find there are times in life where things seem to be going smoothly, where we are moving easily forward in positive ways, where our goals and dreams are clearly in view. And then there are other times when they are obscured by Nepo’s described wall of flames … time to learn another lesson to help us grow. Oftentimes, the lessons are the same ones we have been learning and struggling with all along, but now at a new level, a new depth, with a greater challenge and … with a greater reward for pushing through. Even though we may occasionally lose sight of it in the trying.

Over the years, I have been told to be thankful for these challenges as they are opportunities to grow and to grow closer to my dreams. It’s not always easy to cross through the flames, and, while our hands are burning hot, to be grateful as well. The choice, however, is to stay safe at a far greater cost. What I have learned to do when it seems there are flames all about me is to just put one foot in front of the other and believe. Believe that I am always loved, believe that I will always survive the jump through, and believe that what is on the other side is richer than what I ever imagined.

In front of a wall of flames? Let’s all of us take a breath. Ready? Jump!

Books vs. Movies – Part 1

/ still a dreamer

There’s something exciting about reading a terrific book and then going to the movies to watch the film created from it.  However, I, and most folks I know, are of the opinion that the book generally outshines the movie, if for no other reason that so much of a book’s depth and detail cannot possibly be portrayed in the short time allowed for a film. This is not always the case, but I get ahead of myself.

Having recently read The Bridges of Madison County, I rented the movie. I must say I was really disappointed. First, the book is a very short novel; the movie ran 2-1/4 hours long. As mentioned in an earlier post where I wrote about the book, I had my doubts about Meryl Streep and Clint Eastwood cast as the main characters — both outstanding actors, but I didn’t imagine them in these roles. Again, my personal opinion. I would have much preferred Sam Elliot, or even Kevin Costner, (as he is now), as Robert Kincaid; maybe I’ve just seen Clint Eastwood in too many hard and/or violent roles. Meryl Streep, so brilliant, just couldn’t cut it for me as an Italian woman, now Iowa farm wife. It really took away from the story, and that seemed so drawn out over the course of the 2+ hour movie. I’d stick with the book.

So I’m wondering … did you read the book and/or see the movie? Who might you picture in the roles of Francesca and Robert? Or did Eastwood and Streep fill the bill for you?

p.s. This is just Part 1. Down the road, we’re going to have some fun with Part 2 and onward … it’s all about reading and imagination and what we see.

Coconut Lime Berry Cake

/ still a dreamer / 8 Comments

Berries are in season! So I decided to make my dessert for my friend’s and my Memorial Day get together utilizing some of nature’s bounty. I clipped a recipe for a Coconut Lime Berry Cake a while back from Martha Stewart, and this seemed the perfect time to make it.

I used three very full cups of berries, one each blueberries, blackberries and raspberries, and here it is ready to go in the oven.

It wasn’t a cake that browned very much except around the edges, but it did take a bit longer time than the recipe specified, which I checked twice with the standard toothpick in the middle test.

The cake turned out well, and was very moist. It’s all butter and includes buttermilk, so it’s hard to go wrong on that count, and the berries got soft and mushy, dropping through the batter. Although the grated lime and fresh lime juice gave it a nice tropical kind of kick, I am thinking now that I might like it even better with lemon instead of the lime. And there’s always more time to bake with berries in season.

Be the Change …

/ still a dreamer / 12 Comments

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” – Mahatma Gandi

It sometimes strikes me how often we complain about one thing or another or see behavior we can easily criticize. The world is rapidly changing, and with more and more people involved with texting and their iPhones, etc., it sometimes seems like a less and less friendly world. Certainly, it can seem like a less considerate one.

But really, this is just the current manifestation of what sometimes looks like the breakdown of civilized society. It’s taken on many different faces over the years.

About 16+ years ago, I moved out to this side of the state of New Jersey to a far kinder and gentler life. My county is highly agricultural. There’s still lots of open space, both fields and woods, and it’s inhabited by a lot of people who still have a connection to the land and to nature. It’s a very different mindset than the bustling city, cool as that was when I lived there, or even towns in the suburbs, which still have a very active lifestyle, as did mine.

In my little newfound town in Western NJ was something that, to me,  epitomized the gentler mentality out here … a one way railroad trestle underpass. The trestle is over a well-traveled two-lane blacktop connecting the areas south of it to the very busy Route 78, a mile to the north, which runs across the state, just about into the Hudson River and NYC. What I so loved about this spot was that everyone took turns when they were coming or going under this little one way underpass. “After you.”  “Go ahead,” they waved. Civilization at its best.

Then they started building the McMansions.  With them came a whole lot of people in a big hurry to get to Rt. 78 and their hellish commute to points East. And there went the civility. The motto of these people was “I’m going to get me mine.” And they pushed through, ten cars at a time, if needs be, to make sure they did. But the good thing?

We “locals”, as I suppose we are, didn’t go that route. We kept on waving the next car through the narrow passageway.  If we didn’t get to pass for a few cars, so be it. And I still do that every time I get to that train trestle. Some of the oncoming drivers look surprised. Most wave thanks, just as we all always have. Do those of us who support this small kindness make a difference?There’s no way of knowing. But I still see lots of people taking turns.

What is true, is that by joining the ranks of the inconsiderate and rude, nothing will change for the better. So we can be the change we wish to see in the world, or add to the problem. I believe that whatever we do positive in this world does make a difference. So feel free to wave me on when you get to the underpass, and I’ll do the same for you.

Today, Memorial Day, we can all be a change we’d like to see and it just takes a second and a show of appreciation.  Thank a vet.

The Bridges of Madison County

/ still a dreamer

This story by Robert James Waller is a wonderful, short novel – the depiction of a romance, an affair, between two people whose paths crossed in a juncture in time and space which neither expected. The thought that seems to stay with me about the author’s style is that he writes with the heart of a woman, but the pen of a man. This is not a criticism, but rather a compliment. He tells the story of  Robert Kincaid and Francesca Johnson with the lush feel of romance that a woman knows in her heart, yet without a touch of cloying sentimentality. Waller writes with a rich, but simple and straightforward style that I would generally attribute to a man. It’s a great combination and makes The Bridges of Madison County a fast and engrossing read.

The gentle unfolding of this once-in-a-lifetime experience for the two of them and the simply told background of both characters made them especially real to me. I also really appreciated how the loose ends were tied up in the discovery of Kincaid’s belongings and Francesca’s letter after her death to her two adult children, then followed by an interview with a jazz musician in Washington who’d come to know Kincaid before he died. It was all beautifully done.

The romantic affair that lasted for four days while Kincaid was on assignment for National Geographic and Francesca’s family was away for the week at the state fair was the focus – and gem – of the book. Who wouldn’t be sent dreaming a bit after reading this novel?

As for the movie, I added it to my Netflix queue, but I must say I have my questions about Meryl Streep, brilliant as she is, as an Italian. I know Clint Eastwood plays Robert Kincaid, but I see Clint Eastwood as a bit more hard-edged than I saw Kincaid. He’s an excellent actor, but I’m not imagining that wild romantic streak of Kincaid. I guess I’ll just have to see on that one. I’m always ready to be surprised.

Here is the video and song that Robert James Waller created based on his book. Quality not great, but the song is fantastic. What a talented man.